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Sunday, January 30, 2011
No.1 - Just get her a card
The No.1 way to impress her mom on Mother's Day is to keep it simple, and a card is your best bet. It's understated, it's the holiday standard and you really have to screw up a card in order to have it interpreted as you trying too hard or as you not doing enough.
On the inside, wish her a happy Mother's Day and acknowledge her parenting skills by thanking her for having brought such a beautiful daughter into the world, or acknowledge some other aspect of her life in order to personalize it. If you want to push it, write how you hope her daughter turns out just like her.
On the inside, wish her a happy Mother's Day and acknowledge her parenting skills by thanking her for having brought such a beautiful daughter into the world, or acknowledge some other aspect of her life in order to personalize it. If you want to push it, write how you hope her daughter turns out just like her.
No.2 - Take special care of your own mother
Prioritize. Your own mother always comes first.
No mother would be pleased to learn that her daughter's boyfriend went overboard on her while ignoring his own mom, chiefly because of the negative message it can send her, such as that you were so preoccupied with impressing her that you choked on your own mom; or, if this is how you treat your own mother, you may not be the right guy for her daughter.
In the introduction we mentioned transparency: Throwing your own mom under the bus for her mom will be seen for exactly what it is.
No mother would be pleased to learn that her daughter's boyfriend went overboard on her while ignoring his own mom, chiefly because of the negative message it can send her, such as that you were so preoccupied with impressing her that you choked on your own mom; or, if this is how you treat your own mother, you may not be the right guy for her daughter.
In the introduction we mentioned transparency: Throwing your own mom under the bus for her mom will be seen for exactly what it is.
No.3 - Acknowledge your girlfriend
When push comes to shove, her mother doesn't care about flowers, salons or other gentlemanly gestures; your girlfriend's mom is really only concerned with how you treat her daughter. Mother's Day is one day out of 365; stepping up to the plate to play hero one day out of the year will not necessarily impress. Let her mom know how much you appreciate your girl all the time and try to incorporate your girlfriend into any Mother's Day plans you might have, even though she's not a mother yet.
No.4 - Take the day's burden off her hands
Another way to impress her mom on Mother's Day is to help free up her day so she can go off and do whatever she wants.
Everyone wishes there were more hours in the day, and everyone could use an extra hand sometimes. Why not give your girl's mom the whole day to herself, and do the grocery shopping, or take the car to the shop or whatever other errand she might have to run. Then give them a chance to catch up on mother-daughter time. Your generosity with your time will mean a lot to her if she's a busy woman herself.
Everyone wishes there were more hours in the day, and everyone could use an extra hand sometimes. Why not give your girl's mom the whole day to herself, and do the grocery shopping, or take the car to the shop or whatever other errand she might have to run. Then give them a chance to catch up on mother-daughter time. Your generosity with your time will mean a lot to her if she's a busy woman herself.
No.5 - Reunite her with an old friend
Find out if your girlfriend's mom has an old friend she's lost touch with over the years. Make certain that the two don't have bad blood by probing your girl, and set about tracking down that friend. Social networking sites are a good place to start, as well as other family members. Playing private eye might seem like a good idea, but you don't want to come off as a stalker to her mom or the long-lost friend so be careful how you go about this one.
Once you've tracked down the old acquaintance in a non-creepy way, introduce yourself and try to arrange for this person to call your girlfriend's mom on Mother's Day.
Once you've tracked down the old acquaintance in a non-creepy way, introduce yourself and try to arrange for this person to call your girlfriend's mom on Mother's Day.
No.6 - Arrange a trip to the salon
By a trip to the salon we mean a pampered, mani-pedi kind of thing, something she can enjoy with her daughter and possibly your own mother as well. However, this entry isn't strictly suggesting that; rather, it's suggesting that you arrange a day trip that you know she would enjoy, whether it's to the salon, the wine country or to the 1980s hair metal festival in town for the weekend.
There's no one-size-fits-all idea. And no mother would want to be remembered that way on Mother's Day.
There's no one-size-fits-all idea. And no mother would want to be remembered that way on Mother's Day.
No.7 - Plan a girls' night out
Another way to impress her mom on Mother's Day is by giving her a short break from being a mom -- on a day other than Mother's Day.
Coordinate with a couple of her friends to plan a girls night out, a night on the weekend when she can have a drink, catch up with her friends, and for a few precious hours, not have to be a mom.
Coordinate with a couple of her friends to plan a girls night out, a night on the weekend when she can have a drink, catch up with her friends, and for a few precious hours, not have to be a mom.
No.8 - Cook brunch for her
Cooking a Mother's Day brunch is one of the more ambitious suggestions we have for ways to impress her mom, and we only recommend it if, of course, you know what you're doing. An afternoon of bungled recipes and burned offerings won't be seen as funny or charming -- just a waste of a day.
We wouldn't include such a suggestion if we weren't aware of it actually having worked. However, it might be important to spread the gesture around a bit; invite your mother (and your girl) as well as dad and family. Don't independently monopolize this woman's time; make it a group effort.
We wouldn't include such a suggestion if we weren't aware of it actually having worked. However, it might be important to spread the gesture around a bit; invite your mother (and your girl) as well as dad and family. Don't independently monopolize this woman's time; make it a group effort.
No.9 - Get her a personalized gift
A "Happy Mother's Day" CD of her favorite songs, a DVD set; something personalized like this could prove to be a thoughtful Mother's Day gift, as it can show that you've listened to her in the past and know her interests.
Granted, you may be walking a fine line when you try to find her a personalized Mother's Day gift, but each relationship is different; if you know that she would appreciate it, don't hesitate.
Granted, you may be walking a fine line when you try to find her a personalized Mother's Day gift, but each relationship is different; if you know that she would appreciate it, don't hesitate.
No.10 - Do something handy that she needs or wants done
It's not uncommon in a household for there to be some task or job that her mom has wanted completed for a long time, but one that her dad hasn't gotten around to yet. Find out if such a thing exists in their household; it can't hurt to ask.
It can hurt, however, if you don't include dad -- whether by coordinating with him or just consulting him on the matter. Would you, as a father in your own home, want to be subverted and made to look bad by your daughter's boyfriend? Of course not, so go to him before you wash the car, mow the lawn or fix the fence.
On the other hand, if there is no father figure in the house you are suddenly the savior and have free reign to fix and update whatever her mom has been wishing would be fixed.
It can hurt, however, if you don't include dad -- whether by coordinating with him or just consulting him on the matter. Would you, as a father in your own home, want to be subverted and made to look bad by your daughter's boyfriend? Of course not, so go to him before you wash the car, mow the lawn or fix the fence.
On the other hand, if there is no father figure in the house you are suddenly the savior and have free reign to fix and update whatever her mom has been wishing would be fixed.
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